Match Report

HSBC 6s v Merton 6s


What miserable day.. arriving at the ground after the best part of a 2-hour drive, the heavens opened with a cold, monsoon of a down pour. The excellent facilities of HSBC ground were a warm welcome as the rest of the mob turn up relativity on time… except one… but more on that later!

Sod it… more on that now!

With the teams warmed up and soaked from the relentless driving rain, the Ref called for the captains to approach the centre circle…  the 6s are still doing there team selection, with the manager stalling, waiting on his number 2 (No reference to ‘poo’) to arrive, after being assured with many… many.. many… many texts that he will be there… however, we wait!

Starting in goal, is Mr Majestic himself, the glove man… Martin ‘I don’t get Lobbed anymore’ Quinny (who was on time), starting left back is Luke Newman (who was on time), on loan from the 4s due to 5s not having a game and stepping up in class to the 6s! centre pairing of Tom J (who was on time) and Joe ‘Glass Toes’ Diss (who was on time), with Darren A(who was on time) , also on loan from the 5s, but wait… who’s that in the distances.. running over with a woolly hoodie pulled over his head to hide the shame of turning up with minutes to go… the jeans and hob nail boots, looking like a Chelsea fan from the 70s! why it’s the Merton 6s number 2 (still no reference to ‘poo’), the lovable Mr Burchell… the cries of “Im here, Im here…” echo around the park as he splashes through yet another puddle.

We continue with the selection, Midfield Chris O (who was on time) on the left, Lynden(who was on time)  and Steve H (who was on time) Centre respectively, Andrew D (who was on time) on the right, leaving David G (who was not only on time, but also picked up 3 players, the kit, pumped the balls up and walked his dogs very early in the morning in anticipation at arriving at a ground…. On time!) and Peter O.A (Did I mention, he was on time)… Up Front. Arron A (who was on time) starts on the bench, as he doesn’t like playing football! Team selected… but there’s a whimper coming from near the kit bag… a small grown man is crying “I want to Play”

As the (what looks like tears) water rolls down the smooth bald face of the M6s number 2… the shrieks of ‘I drove 4 hours to get here…’ ring out as he fumbles around looking for some shorts… Not amused, Darren A is sacrificed, and is set the task of looking for the dummy that was spat!

Finally, we kick off… and not a moment too soon, the early exchanges are even and M6s look quite composed on the ball, but a cutting through ball exposes the centre back and H6s go 1-0 with a good finish.

H6s do seem more composed on the ball, the passing is more crisp and direct, where’s M6s seem to be trying too hard to level the game. David and Peter get a couple of good long distant shots off, that don’t trouble the keeper. All the pressure and no gain, H6s take control and push the M6s back in there half, good defending gives H6s a corner. Not sure if it was the driving rain or the greasy pitch, but as the corner comes in, Lynden is unfortunate to see his splice kick sail in to the corner to give H6s 2-0 lead, (and we shall not mention that he almost bagged another, in similar fashion, soon after, but was lucky this time MQ was in the way!… O wait… sorry!!)

Still from kick off, M6s press once again, Andrew on the right has been leading the way in defending as well as attacking, speeding down the line to link play, although it’s a funny site to see on one occasion, the ball getting stuck in a puddle and 3 grown men splashing around trying to clear it (none of which are Steve B, who excels at playing in puddles!)  

The old sucker punch once again, M6s looking to take control of the game are undone once again from their own attack, seeing the ball retuned with interest, MQ could not do anything about the third as he can only watch as the ball is smashed into the net from inside the box.

Still not deterred, M6s on the attack, Chris getting some joy down the left, curls a great ball forward but just in front of David, who is just yards away. The ball is collected out wide by the H6s defender, his unaware that Peter is closing fast, and with a long leg, steals the ball with a well-timed tackle. With speed Pete is back up and swinging a low powerful cross over, which David just needs to ‘dink over the advancing keeper and in off the far post for a 3-1 score line

With the game coming to half time, M6s are on top but can’t make it count, With the rain still pouring the half time chat is to keep going, the need of a bit of luck is required and not all bad! Arron comes on for Lynden to stem the flow of shots at the wrong end, and Joe for Darren A

After a good start by M6s, H6s bagged a 4th and from there on, M6s seem to find everything went against them, a elbow on Arron goes unnoticed, as did a clear elbow in the face of David, in the box, but them the Ref was merely a week older than god himself, but still 20 years younger than our own MQ! 4 becomes 5 as HSBC casually run out worthy winners, the final whistle can’t come quick enough as the sodden M6s still look for their first win in all competitions.

Next week home game is against a good Civ 7 side, who have lost only once in the opening 4 games, so another tough game for the Merton 6s

MOTM: A split decision awarded to Andrew Dodson for the excellent work and lifeguarding skills in and around the puddles on the right wing

DOTD: Joint winners, but in 2nd place is Lynden for crimes against his own keeper, and to Steve Burchell, I might be wrong, but I think he turned up a tad late!


Team: Martin Q, Darren A, Joe D, Tom J, Luke , Chri O, Steve H, Lynden C, Andrew D, David G ©, Peter O.A, Arron A, Steve B

Posted in Match Reports 6s