Author: Matt Haswell
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Todays results. 2s win 3-0 at Carshalton which moves them up to 4th. 5s lose 6-0 to a strong Old Actonians side (pics). The field they played in was a bit muddy, just a bit!!!
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Merton FC U8 v Esher Colts Yellow
The last game of the league fixtures before the Christmas break saw the U8 travel to Esher. The team was still down to a six player squad due to the absence of Aarya who, unfortunately, was still recovering from illness.
The boys got on the pitch with their usual determination. Despite a very good performance by Esher Colts, Merton FC were unstoppable. The team displayed an excellent football performance, varying from one touch passing to personal dribbling skills.
But, as always, the real winner was football, played by two teams of enthusiastic kids all cheered on by a great crowd of supporters.
The MOM was Freddie.
A special thank you to all U8 followers and a wish of a prompt recovery to Aarya.
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- How come the 5s get so many spectators turning up to watch their games?
- All their suspended players come to watch.
- They play the most attractive passing football with impeccable behaviour (Shurly shum mistake??)
- Curiosity – you never know what is going to happen.
- It is the best way of getting out of playing for the 4s.
- When you sink down in the changing room what should you do with the kit?
- Take it off roughly and throw it in to the pile at the end of the room in any sort of shape.
- Take it off carefully brushing off excess mud and putting it all the right way round in a nice neat pile of all the dirty kit that you are organising.
- Make sure that it is put on top of all the remaining unused kit and mixed in with it to ensure it will all need washing.
- How many players in a Merton Team?
- 13 on Monday evening
- A worrying 11 on Thursday morning
- An even more worrying 10 on Friday night
- 10 five minutes before kick off
- 11 or more by half time but not all on the pitch.
- After the match you should clean your boots but where?
- In the shower!!
- With the hosepipe /bucket outside!
- I didn’t know there was a hosepipe/bucket (There will be one).
- I didn’t know there was a shower
- I scored a hat trick so I am not washing this magic off.
- Having attended to your ablutions should you
- Dive off to the bar immediately to buy the referee /teammates /opposition a drink and engage them in lively and edifying conversation delighting in their goalscoring prowess.
- When the manager asks you keep your availability for next week a closely guarded secret till you know where the game is.
- Pay your match fee/arrears and fines and tell him you are available for CEV or anywhere within 3hrs travelling.
- Immediately disappear with the old ‘off to find a cash machine’ excuse not to be seen till next week.
- You have been sent off unjustly for ‘foul and abusive language’ so on spotting the referee in the bar should you
- Apologise profusely and offer to buy him a drink and find out what he made of the game and tell him where to get the food.
- Schmooze him, buy him a drink, tell him ‘what happens on the pitch should stay on the pitch ‘(although you didn’t )and try he really does not want to get involved in all that paperwork over a little misunderstanding with an old friend.
- Explain to him with the aid of pencil, paper and protractor, a smidgin of ballistics and geometry that if the ball came off at that angle and with that spin it could not possibly have been their throw.
- Explain that when you shouted out ‘You cheating c**t it was obviously not referring to him but your teammate who was neglecting his defensive duties.
- Prostrate yourself on the floor in the corner of the bar in front of Dodge and beg forgiveness and buy him a drink
- All of the above in that order and contemplate a move to France.
- What is the most popular excuse for unavailability?
- The games in North London and a journey there iinvalidates my life assurance policies.
- I’ve got a family event./The photographer is going to be late for the family portrait so i wont be able to make it..
- RPV have promised me £50 a week, all I can drink and all sorts of unprintable things.
- Done a ‘Hammy’.
- One of our long gone players called a recently departed player ‘a real club man’. Which of the following is a ‘Real club man’
- He gets yellow carded then straight red carded in extra time for kicking out (causing side to lose close cup match in extra time)and abuses the referee and club officials as he leaves the pitch/club, refuses to acknowledge AFA disciplinary actions or pay fees and fines, asks for refund of membership fees and claims to move to France.
- Gives up his own team game and Saturday to travel to the other side of London with his team mates to fulfil a cup fixture for a higher Merton team with little hope of any success other than upholding the Clubs reputation and the SAL rules.
(This is not a trick question –It is that simple)
- Now a strange incident occurred in the 4s game against HSBC at the end of November. With the HSBC attacker through on goal our defender pulled him back just outside the box. Play continued but just before HSBC netted the ball for a goal the ref blew up for the original foul. Uproar !! The ref then called both captains together and asked them what they would like to do. Having consulted he then came to a really sensible pragmatic solution and awarded the goal and only yellow carded our man. What would you have done???? Would you do;
- Award a Free kick outside the area and send Chappell off
- Let the goal stand and send Chappell off
- Consult both captains, see what they want to do and send Chappell off anyway.
- Not sure, tricky but definitely send Chappell off.
- What do we call that time of year when the pitches are 2” deep in water and it is really difficult for Merton to get enough players to fulfil its SAL fixtures. Is it known as
- The festive season
- The rainy season
- The monsoons season
No guys you know its
- …. The football season….Thats the one.
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Will take place at Jo Hood on Saturday 24th January. The quiz will start promptly at 7.30pm.This year it will be £10 per person – this will include a full curry at half time, additional sides & sundries, full quiz and live music……The maximum number per team will be five – as per last year….The quiz will have 8 rounds and the curry to be eaten at half time – estimated to be 8.30pm…..There will also be a Merton raffle on the night – before the final round of the quiz! To reserve a table and of course a team – I must be notified please so I can ensure on numbers – catering & comfortable seating – lay-out for all……… As always peoples and your support of these events and inviting friends / entering teams is hugely helpful towards making the night a success – so please continue to do so! Many Thanks Sherbs 07595709933
YOU MUST REGISTER YOUR TEAM / OR ATTENDANCE BY END OF PLAY MONDAY 19th JANUARY – SO WE CAN ENSURE EVERYONE IS CATERED FOR.
Teams & team captains so far entered: (people looking to enter their own team or join a team STILL CAN – they simply need to ask the relevant people)
Team Handsome (2s – captained by CJ Rayner & Jason Thomas)
The Un-dateables (last year’s winners) captained by David Quainton
The 1s (captained by Simon Clapperton & James Tilley)
The 6s captained by Steve Burchill
Lewis Ackerman – The 1s
The Murphy’s
Back Saturday (Mark Chappell, Mike Reed, Paul Welch, Simon White, Arturs Ivanovs)
The Under 12s x 3 teams
The Under 8s
The Presidents Team
The Under 11s
Wimbledon United Cricket Team (Peter Brown)
The Rayner’s
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Presidents Cup
Old Ruts (1) 3 Merton (1) 2
This is an excellent Christmas event for our club and it is a pity when Old Ruts put on such a good show that we are not able to support it better. It was a little difficult to raise a team and i was grateful to the last minute call ups who stepped into the breach so we fielded a good eleven of enthusiastic players. And we played some good football.
The game started pretty evenly but we were reliant on a well organised defence with Rat at the heart of it. We had some good passing moves but our attacks seemed to break down in the last third. But after 25 mins Ricardo broke down the right and was brought down heavily for a penalty and Femi slotted it to give us the lead,. Unfortunately Ricardo was unable to continue although he hobbled along till half time. They were soon level when we conceded a free kick which we did not defend that well but it was well flighted and headed in. One sporting moment in the first half should not go unmentioned when the ref awarded Old Ruts a penalty and the player owned up to there being no contact. Good stuff.
At half time we pressed one of our supporters Darren to change into the kit and make up the eleven which he did with great purpose and commitment. The game opened up and there was some good attacking play. We had a good chance when Seb broke free but fired narrowly wide.fNo sooner had Femi cut in from the left and hit a fierce shot against the bar than Old Ruts broke downfield and a cross and header gave them the lead. And that was the end of the scoring. Although we did have chances to equalise but they had better ones to wrap it up completely. The game was played an a good surface and was wel reffed. Thanks to Old Ruts for their excellent hospitality and laying on this fixture which is such a good post Xmas event for us. Thanks to the supporters who braved the elements; it was a touch parky but the curry warmed you up after. Thanks to Steve Dewsbury for helping out and running the line and all the lads who stepped up and played.
Team; Arturs, Chris Outred, Rat, Paul Welch. Neal, CJ Rayner, Seb, Femi, Matt, Denys Ricardo (Daren).
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This was going to be another stern test for Merton as we travelled to table topping Poly in Chiswick. Another SAL club with really good facilities and 6+ pitches. I was surprised to see the Uni side playing a training match on the 1s pitch as this has always been jealously protected and consequently it was not quite so good as in the past but it was still a very good surface. Poly have had a little dip in form lately losing in the cup last week at HSBC (3rd Div) and at home to Alleyns. We were out of the blocks very quickly and created a couple of openings and it was a few minutes before Poly got into the game. They are clearly a very good side and neither side really got on top, but just before half time of a pretty even contest a Poly break resulted in a penalty. Whilst it was not the best Angus saved it and we went into the break all square.
Poly started the second half better and created and missed a pretty good chance and then scored with a really great strike after Angus had made another great save. We came back at them really well and played some really good attacking football, breaking from defence and passing incisively. None better than Will Low who was filling in at left back for Al Gladkow and was outstanding. Ackers got the ball in the net with a good lob but was penalised for offside or a push on the centre back, could have been either, probably neither. This was a short reprieve as another flowing move started down the left and swung across field opened up Poly’s defence and Vanny rifled it home. For the next 15 mins we created and Poly had a number of escapes with Snooks, Vanny and Tills all having chances. At the end though Poly came back at us and a snap shot in the last moments went desperately close.
This was the best that I have seen Merton play. Clappers had the side really well organised and everyone did their job. The back four was excellent and Will Low showed his value to the side with an outstanding performance in an unfamiliar left back position. Snooks was magnificent in mid field well supported by Woody and Tills who battled well. Ackers lead the line tirelessly but a worrying hammy caused his substitution. Bosh and Vanny threatened down the wings, replaced with 10 mins to go by Dan Whiteman and Tom Rowe whose fresh legs were welcome relief. Angus in goal was our Man of the Match in an excellent team performance. The game was well reffed by Mr. Turnbull and Poly’s hospitality was very welcome.
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After 3 weeks on non-football due to poor weather conditions, the U8 were back in action.
They boys were eager to play again and their enthusiasm got the better of them, as they conceived within a few seconds from the kick off.
However, the team kept their spirit up and replied with tenacity and great team work against a very well organise and skilful Carshalton side.
As the game progressed in the second quarter, Carshalton got the upper hand and went ahead and seemed to be able to control the game.
Not so! The U8 never gave up and turned around the game in the last two quarters, bringing home an emphatic and well deserved win, with the invaluable support given by the ever present “Parents Fan Club”.
The MOM was Joseph.
As always, thanks to all spectators and well done to both team for a great game of football.
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Saturday night (13th Dec) saw the traditional Merton Club Fancy Dress Christmas drinks in the bar and it was really buzzing. With the 1s getting a good draw at table topping Poly and the Reserves excellent performance in beating Poly res 4-2 at home there were a lot of happy Merton members in the bar. Thanks to Peter and Jasper for manning the bar. And to all those who supported the function and dressed up.
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Sundays Youth Results and a very good day for Merton in their last games before Christmas. The Under 8s beat Esher Colts 6-0, the
U11s beat Kew Park Rangers 3-0 and the U12s beat Esher Lions 3-1 with goals from Charlie (MOM) Fabian and Joe Adams from the spot. Well done to all the boys, parents and Managers. Excellent results.
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Todays Resu;ts 1s get a well deserved point at table topping Poly. Angus (pic) saves a pen and Vanny scores again. World War 1 commemorative pic 2s beat Poly res 4-2 with Femi getting a couple of goals and Will Taylor and Craig Usher scored. 3s lose a close one at Old Ws 1 nil and 5s draw 0-0.
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Merton FC Stats End of Season
